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Joke of the Day

"Parents always loved asking this joke. If a day old ant, takes a week to learn how to walk in a month's time, how many lemons are in a bag of pumpkins? A banana of this colour."

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"Why did the man throw his watch out the window? He wanted to see time fly!"
"What browser do you use to watch porn? Bill Gates: ""Internet Explorer"" Sundar Pichai: ""Google Chrome"" Tim Cook: ""Safari"" Jared Fogle: ""Tor"""
"If you love someone... Bury them in your backyard so no one can find them. Then you'll have them FOREVER! *looks out window & smiles*"
"How did jew get beer? He brew"
"How do you know a homeless woman is menstruating? If she's only wearing one sock. (This joke brought to you courtesy the homeless guy outside my local 7-11.) Edit: tweaked the punchline."
"Just found some clothes my ex left here. Perfect timing since I'm out of toilet paper."
"Butt-sex is a lot like spinach... If you're forced to have it as a child, you won't enjoy it as an adult. -Daniel Tosh"
"Welcome to our nearly empty restaurant. Please follow me to our worst table."
"""Shit just got real."" - God, creating the digestive system"