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Joke of the Day

"If you love someone... Bury them in your backyard so no one can find them. Then you'll have them FOREVER! *looks out window & smiles*"

"Wow Monica Lewinski is 50 They grow up so fast. It seems like it was just yesterday, she was crawling around the Oval Office putting everything in her mouth."

"Donald Trump & Mexican Are AT A Restaurant On The Border Mexican Grill"

"Some guy had a concrete bench as his memorial. Seems odd but it's genius; he's dead and still getting ass."

"You are 15 years old you should feel butterflies in your stomach not a baby kicking"

"why do elephants paint their toe nails red? to hide in cherry trees. have you ever seen an elephant hiding in a cherry tree? works doesn't it"

"Today I saw two dogs make hot streamy love on the roadside. It's really hurtful to see your ex moving on so quickly."

"I'm flying to NYC today and I don't care what the flight attendant says, I will be using my seat cushion as a fartation device."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you stole daddys car! Why you steal daddys car?! (chappie joke I stole from youtube)"

"Why did Hitler really commit suicide? He got his gas bill."