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Joke of the Day
"Q: what did one lumber jack say to another lumber jack? A: ""I need to axe you a question."""
Next Joke
"A woman walks into a library and says to the bloke behind the counter, ""Have you got any books on the female clitoris?"" The bloke says, ""Yes we have madame, but I don't know where they are."""
"Q: What did Captain Cook say to his men before they got on the ship? A: Let's get on the ship, men!"
"What did Geoffrey Dahmer say..... What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit? Are you going to eat that?"
"Welcome to the jungle. My name is Axl Rose. I think you'll find we run a pretty good jungle here. There's the toilet *points everywhere*"
"I saw a man yesterday who was so bald I could see what he was thinking."
"I've decided my tweets sound better when I say them so instead of tweeting I'm just gonna call all of you when I think of stuff."
"Choosing between Hillary and Trump is like having to fart really bad while sitting between Scarlett Johansson and The Pope. I don't know which way to lean."
"What do you get when you mix the atlantic with the titanic About half way"
"What's al-Qaeda's favorite football team? The New York Jets"