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Joke of the Day
"How many Catholics can you fit in a habit? Nun"
Next Joke
"The snow in the front yard is melting and so far I've found 3 unopened beers. *Adds party planner to resume*"
"What do you call a Jew who is terrible with money? Bernie Sanders."
"I tried mugging an old aged pensioner yesterday. I said, ""Give me all your money now, bitch, or you're geography."" ""Don't you mean history?"" she replied. I said, ""Don't try to change the subject."""
"""Help me, I'm slowly turning into a ghost from the top down."" -Mrs. Butterworth"
"If only the person that named ""walkie talkies"" had been in charge of naming so many more household objects."
"What does a north Korean and a ginger have in common? Neither has a Seoul"
"What did the overly excited gardener do when spring arrived? He wet his plants."
"How many Vietnam Vets does it take to change a light bulb? What, you don't know? Well I guess you weren't FUCKING THERE, MAN!"
"Ladies, if you've ever walked by a van with no windows and you're reading this, it's because you're ugly."