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Joke of the Day

"Friend: I got a job as a carpenter, but it sucks. Me: No prob, just learn a few magic tricks and people will worship you as their savior."

"Why is Rob Zombie good for the health of Redditors? They see his AMA and turn off the computer."

"A baby seal walks into a bar. The bartender says ""what'll ya have"" Seal replies ""Anything but Canadian Club."

"What's the difference between a bowling ball and a French girl? You can only fit three fingers in a bowling ball."

"A Stupid Boyfriend Thought LOL Meant ""Lots Of Love"". So He Sent This Text To His Girlfriend,""You Are Only Girl Of My Life.......LOL""."

"Q: How many Serbs does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two-one to shoot the old bulb out and one to screw the new one in."

"I'd like to thank my skeletal system for all the support it's given me over the years."

"If everyone contributes a small amount of their income... Together we can pool the resources to defeat socialism."

"How bad does an atheist smell? Ungodly"

"How does a Scotsman find a sheep in the tall grass? Very satisfying. Retweaked joke: How does a (insert nationality here) find a sheep in the tall grass? Very (insert extremely lustful emotion here)!"