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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriends father wont let us sleep together when I stay over Which is a shame because he's a very attractive man."

"What does a mermaid wear to math class An algae-bra I'm not sorry"

"Q: How many Russians does it take to change a light bulb? A: That's a military secret."

"Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road? To get to the dark side..."

"What's Michael J. Fox's favorite drink? a milkshake"

"If they could bottle how good it feels to take off your bra, that would sell for more than any expensive wine."

"Why are so many Italians named Tony? Because when they left the old country, immigration officers put a sticker on their lapel that read To NY."

"Why did the Catholic cross herself?"

"Why does Jesus perform miracles on quadriplegics? He can't fuckin stand 'em."

"Shouting ""Shotgun"" will get you the front seat of a car or a heap of cash if you whisper it to a cashier."