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Joke of the Day

"Math joke Dear Algebra, please stop asking us to find your x. She is not coming back."

"The doctor told my wife her cervix is still really hard last night. How would the doctor know that without sticking her whole hand......omg"

"What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner? Placement of the dirt bag."

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field."

"Be thankful for stupid people, they make it easier for the rest of us to get ahead in life."

"your mamas feet are so scaly you can see crocodile dundy in her foot bath."

"How many Harvard graduates does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. He holds up the light bulb, and the world revolves around him *I'll see myself out*"

"Oh, you asked if I had a perfect BEACH body. Now I see why you were confused when I said ""Yes, I'm round, ripe & covered in fuzz."""

"*on time travel bus* oh you're going back to kill hitler? uh yeah totally, me too *pulls jacket over spice girls world tour '98 t shirt*"

"i just found that children's tylenol is made for children, not out of children, and i feel relieved. but that could just be the tylenol..."