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Joke of the Day

"What did Russia say to Ukraine after the conflict was over? Cry me a peninsula."

"I got fired from my job as a jihadist. They told me to blow up a bus, and I burnt my lips on the exaust pipe."

"a pizza is basicaly a real-time pie chart of how much pizza i am going to eat"

"[walks in on someone watching Wheel Of Fortune] What's this, Wheel of Fortune?"

"What does a woman get every month that lasts 3-5 days? Her husband's salary."

"Have You Heard The One About The Sheep? It's baaad..."

"How did ISIS become so powerful? They got a head"

"What's another term for anal bleaching? Changing your ring tone."

"How many James Pattersons does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he'll just hire a ghostwriter to do it for him."

"What did the banana say to the vibrator? I don't know why you're shaking, she's gonna eat me."