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Joke of the Day
"Why do my eyes hurt? Because I got eye lashes."
Next Joke
"Guy on fb posted a picture of his baby w/ the caption ""1st Easter!"" Hell no, there have been like 2000, we're not starting over just for him"
"Why Doesn't Santa Have Any Kids? Because he comes down the chimney."
"Does it creep anyone else out that Donald Duck eats a turkey dinner on 'Once Upon A Christmas'? Isn't that a form of cannibalism?"
"What's the difference between peanut-butter and jam ? You can't peanut-butter it into her ass !"
"I realised I've got a road rage problem when my five-year-old daughter shouted... ...""Pick a fucking lane,you dickhead!"" While sitting in my grocery trolley."
"Why do people with heart disease always lose at poker? They have to take ACE inhibitors."
"I heard about a woman who doesn't use her feet... I really want to meter."
"Submarines are just hipster boats."
"My Taiwanese friend is very intense and driven: He has a real Taipei personality"