124438

Joke of the Day

"The right response to ""I'm a bit tied up at the moment"" isn't ""what are you wearing?"" Apparently."

"I am married to 4 different women And it's bigamy to admit it."

"I remember when my son fell asleep at a house party we had. I decided to shave his eyebrows off and draw a cock on his face. My wife went mental when she picked him up to change his nappy."

"What's the difference between hardware and software? Hardware breaks if you*don't* maintain it."

"Q: Why do drummers always have trouble entering a room ? A: They never know when to come in."

"The Flintstones becomes an entirely different show when you consider Fred & Barney probably weren't wearing underwear."

"Jim: I'm totally spacing out on a word. Me: OK J: What's that awful thing called... M: ... J: You wake up with it after you drink? M: Linda."

"What happens on Santa's lap......stays on Santa's lap."

"Doctor Doctor! I'm turning invisible! Yes.. I can see your not all there.."

"[NSFW] What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up cunts"