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Joke of the Day
"What did the woman say after 5 guys came on her for a porn video? Thank you all for coming!"
Next Joke
"When I tell people I don't speak English to get out of a conversation I randomly throw the word hemorrhoid just to bring it home"
"Accidentally got two shots of hand sanitizer so if you need me I'll be rubbing my hands together for the rest of my life."
"Son: can I go? Dad: storm coming, tornado warnings Son: yeah I know Dad: wait for your brother to get home, he can continue the bloodline"
"Why couldn't the pony speak clearly? He was a little hoarse."
"Girl, I like you so much, I might even let you hold my phone....some day, while its locked"
"I spend like $600 every month on free trials for stuff I forgot to cancel."
"I'll always remember what my dad told me right before he died: ""of course you're supposed to use that much lighter fluid idiot."""
"My grandpa says our generation relies too much on technology... I replied ""No, YOUR generation relies too much on technology"", and unplugged his life support."
"Q: Why did the ghoul eat a light bulb? A: Because he was in need of a light snack."