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Joke of the Day

"If the Jewish population is 16.6 million people with a constant rate of change, what is 23% of the Jewish population after five years? Ashes"

"If you're constantly posting ""loving my life!"" as your Facebook status, you're probably not."

"There's a new movie coming out about people who take a long time to orgasm... It hasn't released yet."

"If you're in a Mexican prison, ""Jesus loves you"" might not be very comforting words..."

"I looked at the calendar and thought, ""It's been one of those days today."""

"I couldn't figure out how the hammer and nails worked... So I just said ""Screw it."""

"There are two goldfishes in a bowl. There are two goldfishes in a fish bowl. One says to the other, ""Trevor, why do the humans think us fish are stupid?"" Trevor says, ""Sorry, who are you again?"""

"50% of analysis is... anal."

"What did Ronda Rousey's face look like after her fight with Holly Holm? It was all broused up!"

"Sick of tweeting. Switching to faxing. What's everybody's fax numbers?"