124207

Joke of the Day

"I wanted to go as the invisible man for Halloween this year. But my Girlfriend made me put my clothes back on."

"I'm not sure if this snake is trying to ask me a question or if he's just eaten a candy cane."

"A man's got to know his limitations. Unless he's in a relationship, then he'll be constantly reminded."

"The GF goes away for 10 days, *shits going to get wild * sleeps in middle of bed"

"What comes after Brexit ? BREICH"

"I made fun of a guy for still having a Nokia phone. He threw it at me and knocked me unconscious."

"[Friday Night] WIFE: Have fun at poker ME {stopping at door}: What did you say? W: Have fun ME: After that W: Uh..at poker- ME: IT'S POKEMAN"

"What did the man say to the priest at the beach? Do you mind getting out of my son."

"Sorry I called you a drunk, but in my defense, I didn't think you'd remember."

"I carry a gun because I'd rather be judged by 12 than carried by six."