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Joke of the Day

"TIL of a man who masturbated in public for 16 hours straight before police arrived. He was wrist strained."

"How many lawyer jokes are there? 3, and the rest are true stories."

"What's the difference between Whose Line is it Anway and /r/jokes? On Whose Line is it Anyway, *everything* is made up."

"Teacher: Tomorrow There Will Be a Lecture On SUN.. student: I Will Not Be Able To Attend It Teacher: Why? student: My Mother Will Not Allow Me To Go So Far..:-)"

"What do you tell a person with two swollen eyes ? Nothing, you already told 'em twice."

"How do you make a Kleenex dance? Blow a little boogie into it!"

"I've just started going out with some anorexic twins, two birds one stone"

"What looks like red paint but is dry? Dried red paint"

"Always have a fake name at the ready so you don't tell the cops something stupid, like ""Andrew Granola."""

"flappy bird misunderstanding someone told me to get flappy bird. trying to pick up women from my local bingo hall, was not what they meant."