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Joke of the Day

"And then God said: Let women have infallible memory. But technology said: And screenshots, just in casies."

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"What did the gay horse say to the straight horse? Heeeeeeyyyyyy"
"Uber driver just asked me ""how much would you pay to go swimming in the sky?"" I wish I hadn't seen how dilated his pupils were. Also, $975."
"""10 Totally Epic Reasons Why You're Going Straight to Hell"" - 2013 version of Ten Commandments"
"[deathbed] Son....come closer ""Yes dad?"" We need a new man of the house ""I'd-"" *presses fake mustache into his hands* Give this to your sister"
"What is the difference between a wife and a mistress? The mistress says ""Oh darling! That was *wonderful*!"" The wife says ""Beige. I think we'll paint the ceiling beige."""
"Of course everyone seems sexy in a nightclub. There's liquor and you can't hear them."
"Roast Pussy sandwich http://imgur.com/BnBLkkb"
"Why did the chicken fall in the well? He couldn't see that well."
"I learned something new about Hordor (GOT SPOILERS) He's Canadian."
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