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Joke of the Day

"Women say they want a guy who can make them laugh. I'd probably have done better if they'd specified that they didn't mean by tickling."

"Adrian Peterson got a new job... he was picked up by the Minnesota twins... He's gonna be their new ""switch hitter"""

"Ever notice Santa brings way nicer shit to rich kids than poor kids? Hey kids ,maybe it's time to do a little Christmas critical thinking."

"How many transgender people does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one. But they have to sit in the dark room for a year, first, to make sure that the lightbulb is *definitely* out."

"Did you hear about the Supreme Court ruling that you can marry a sandwich? Yeah, the BLT community are very excited!"

"It's not that I don't care about the environment, it's just your fabric grocery bag doesn't match my outfit."

"If Africa had more mosquito nets... ...we'd save millions of mosquitos from dying of Aids each year"

"Testing, please ignore Test^(ing)"

"There was a huge accident on the freeway today involving two Astro Vans filled with Mexican families... ... Over 100 people were involved in the accident..."

"I like my women like I like my coffee... With no stray pubes."