123025
Joke of the Day
"I like my exes suicides how I like my whiskey On the rocks."
Next Joke
"Reminder: Please just hit the ""RT"" button on my tweets if you're ugly. Don't want people associating your busted face with my art."
"A lot of people tend to say life is like a rollercoaster. It is! Specifically the Smiler in Alton Towers. You start out with nervous excitement and by the end of it you need new knees."
"Teacher: When you yawn your supposed to put your hand to your mouth! Pupil: What? and get bitten!"
"Why are jewish people's noses so big Because air is free"
"Policeman: I suppose you're going to tell me you weren't speeding. Motorist: I was speeding all right but I was testing you to see if you were paying attention."
"Madonna is tryin to get Spice Girls back together. Only condition is she gets to join them. They gonna call her Old Spice."
"If getting a tan is wrong then I don't wanna be white."
"What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese."
"Apparently ""you have great tweets"" sounds a lot like ""you have great tits"" in a crowded bar."