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Joke of the Day

"Dear posters of /r/jokes, can't you be a bit more original with your posts? My friends say they are tired of hearing the same jokes over and over again."

"Carol from Facebook said she's ""taking it one day at a time,"" so I responded ""me too. That's how days work."""

"How many times should you check whether a sentence is written in English or Spanish? Once."

"Find a way to dress up as ""accidentally liking someone's Facebook picture from 2 years ago"" and really scare people this Halloween."

"(NSFW) Why does Beyonce sing ""To the left, to the left""? Because niggers have no rights. or Option 2: Because women have no rights."

"I thought I wanted to get married again. Then I laughed and remembered why I shouldn't think."

"[Pastabot 2000 attempts to hand me another bowl of pasta] Jesus christ not now Pastabot"

"Where do Polar Bears keep their money? In the Snowbank. My first post is a dad joke LOL"

"What's it called when a smart girl jerks you off? A stroke of genius!"

"TIL there is a nerve that runs from the tear duct to the anus. If you don't believe me, let me pull a hair from your ass and see if it doesn't bring a tear to your eye."