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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a blood vessel with a carrot jammed into it? A carroted artery."
Next Joke
"Me: Why do you love me? Wife: *shrugs* Me: Why do you find me annoying? Wife: *reveals six spreadsheets and a pie chart*"
"What's an empty suit of armor doing on the drivers side of a car? He went out for the knight. OK I'll leave now"
"Your momma is so fat... But I still fucked her."
"I told my doctor that I recently broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places."
"Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because if they live by the bay, they would be bagels!"
"What happens when you have sex with a cow and no one catches you? So far, nothing."
"A friend of mine is going to cosmetology school... I told her all the tests will be make-up exams."
"What does Korean food taste like? Chinese food."
"The Baby Boomers decided to leave us with one last present. This Presidential election."