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Joke of the Day

"SHAME ON YOU LOT for showing newby tweeters bad behaviour this weekend *ring ring* ME: Hello FRIEND: Nat. Why is my son saying the F Word?"

"Why would Superman have won any race he ran against Roy Roger's dog? Because he was faster than a speeding Bullet ..."

"A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police He's now a seasoned veteran."

"Q: How many Waiters does it take to change a light bulb? A: None even a burned out bulb can't catch a waiters eye"

"I have sex daily. I mean dyslexia!"

"King Midas doesn't like baths He likes golden showers."

"Wish that Facebook had a ""drama of the day"" section to quick reference in my feed."

"A neutrino walks into a bar... and no fucks were given."

"Two satellites got married the wedding was okay, but the reception was incredible!"

"Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him"