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Joke of the Day

"I'd like to go to Holland some day... Wooden shoe?"

"A bathroom scale that when you stand on it just says ""Your body is but a point in space; your life, a differential of time."""

"Trump Says Immigrants take Jobs Americans Refuse to take. Like being his wife."

"Camper: There's a leak over my bunk! Counselor: That's what we said in the camp ads. Running water in every cabin!"

"Years after presidency, the introverted former president Obama is asked if he has ever had an affair. He responds with ""I've never been one to cum outside of Michelle."""

"I hate Ancient Greek History! Fuck the poleis!"

"I can't get my dog to stop chasing people on bikes. I guess I'll have to take his bikes away."

"Why do you want to run for President? Because walking wouldn't burn enough calories."

"I wonder why call them backup vocals. Was there ever a time the lead fainted and the backup took over the mic and the show went on as usual?"

"Not feeling great about how much scrolling down I have to do to get to my birth year."