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Joke of the Day

"V8 What kind of sexually transmitted disease can you get from an octopus?"

"Whenever I get called into my boss's office, my entire Facebook career flashes before my eyes."

"I always pick up a huge cucumber up at walmart and yell to my wife ""you said you wanted the biggest one right"" Because I'm a great husband"

"the worst part about hitting a child in public... is getting caught by their parents."

"""Tell me"" said the hiker to the local farmer ""will this pathway take me to the main road?"" ""No sir"" replied the farmer ""you'll have to go by yourself!"""

"What do astronomers do when they have nowhere else to turn? They default in our stars"

"A man calls his family doctor: man: Doctor for the last week my wife has thought that she was a rabbit. doctor: Ok bring her in and I'll try to help. man: Fine but whatever you do don't cure her."

"What is atheism? A non-prophet organisation."

"She blinded me with Science. Okay, it was pepper spray."

"Funniest joke on wife Always love your mother because you will not get another . . Ok. Agreed! Always love your ~~mother~~ wife even though you will ~~never~~ get another one later.."