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Joke of the Day

"That stupid guy I have stupid friends gotta admit.But i have a stupid one. Yesterday he asked me did anybody die and survive??!?!?!??"

"Pete and Repete are in a boat together. Pete jumps out of the boat. Who is left in the boat?"

"My girlfriend asked me if her vagina smelled like fish... I said; ""Yes, Ariel, it does."""

"Girl, are you expansionary monetary policy? Because my Aggregate Demand is growing."

"007 is fired, becomes a scientist. He opens meetings with, ""The name's Bond, Hydrogen Bond."" Everyone laughs. He cries in the supply closet."

"What does a blonde woman is doing with her ear bonded to the wall ? Listening *house*."

"When someone says to me great minds think alike, I just look at them and think ""you fucking dirty bastard"""

"How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? One, you racist!"

"I just swept a girl off her feet. I'm quite an aggressive janitor."

"A man walks into a bar and says ""OW!"""