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Joke of the Day

"What has two legs and bleeds? Half a puppy."

"""But Lot's wife looked back as she was following behind him, and she turned into a pillar of salt, and Lot was like 'wtf' "" Genesis 19:26"

"My friends call me The Archeologist Because I date old, dusty pieces of junk"

"A priest and a rabbi are walking together. The priest sees an attractive young boy and asks the rabbi , do you want to fuck him? The rabbi asks , out of what?"

"You wanna know about hippie sex? It's in tents."

"Can God be an atheist? Yes, if he has low self esteem and stops believing in himself."

"I can't decide if I should get a new mattress or not. I should probably sleep on it."

"F*ck and F*ck are sitting on a fence... F*ck falls off, WHO GIVES A F*CK! Stupidity is a niche! ~Skip"

"What is yellow and can't swim An excavator :D"

"My wife and I only smoke after sex; I've had the same pack since 2003. She's up to three packs a day. Rodney Dangerfield"