121083

Joke of the Day

"Why does Bernie Sanders support abortions? Because even after he's blown his load he won't pull out."

"a sphincter says what? pants up, dont poop."

"What's worse than getting pissed off? Getting pissed on."

"Makes a girlfriend in IIT. Breaks up with her. Adds Ex IITian in bio."

"I can swallow two pieces of string and make them come out an hour later tied together I SHIT YOU KNOT"

"What kind of blood does a born loser have? Typo"

"What happens when you give a politician viagra? He gets taller"

"If da Vinci were alive today, the ""Mona Lisa"" would have been called ""IMG-20121020-00463.jpg"""

"I need a volunteer to test Stockholm syndrome. Any takers? Edit: This is a dumb joke..."

"You should feel pretty honoured if I subtweet you. But the tweet you think is about you, probably isn't. Twitter's hard. Get a helmet."