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Joke of the Day
"I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost three days already."
Next Joke
"A whorehouse got burned down today... Some came out running, and some ran out cummimg."
"Saw a sign outside of an office building which said.. .. ""Today's workshop 'How To Cope With Disappointment' has been cancelled"""
"How far away is the US Army's website? Just a few klicks away."
"Someone hit me in the head with a bottle of omega 3 tablets the other day. It's OK, it was just a super fish oil wound"
"If Jennifer Lawrence was a poet, what would her name be? Maya Ingenue"
"Did you hear about the new ""morning after"" pill for men? It changes your blood type."
"What do you call a bird that drunkenly conveys a compelling perspective on racial hatred? Tequila Mockingbird."
"[driving 2 school] *looks back,sees toothbrushes in child carseats WAIT! IF YOU'RE HERE THEN... [cut to kids at home, covered in toothpaste]"
"What do you call cows with 2 legs? Lean beef. bonus: What do you call cows with no legs? Ground beef."