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Joke of the Day

"My internet goes at 20mb per second... wonder how much faster it goes per first!"

"What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fisheyes"

"What's the most beautiful thing in mathematics? A cute angle"

"My girlfriend says she prefers a dildo over me. I never saw it coming"

"What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino (Hell-if-I-know)"

"I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went.L Then it dawned on me."

"People tell me that I'm a bad knitter oops, wrong thread"

"I tell people I broke my neck playing sports but it was actually from flicking my ponytail to unleash ancient curses."

"What's the second fastest thing in the world? > Your asshole pinching shut after dropping a deuce. What's *the* fastest thing in the world? > The ice-cold drop of water that gets in first."

"*sticks switchblade into bag of NES cartridges, licks tip of knife, nods to boss* It's good."