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Joke of the Day

"What do you call pasta sex? pennetration."

"Hi, I'm Megan. You may know me from such public encounters with kids as ""No, YOUR face is stupid"" and ""I didn't trip you, you fell""."

"Everyone one knows Nissan's Motorsport brand, NISMO.... But most forget Honda's brand, HOMO...it's pretty gay if you ask me..."

"I tell my daughter she has no idea how lucky she is. When I was 12, I had to use a pay phone and walk 10 miles in the snow to get weed"

"Why does Piglet smell so bad? Because he always plays with Pooh."

"The safe word is ""MMMBop."""

"What's the best part of dating 28 year olds? There's 20 of them!"

"Why did the hipster burn himself while eating pizza? Because he ate it before it was cool."

"You can get out of jury duty on the first day by blatantly winking at the defendant as you give them a double thumbs up."

"How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You wave :)"