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Joke of the Day
"What's the worst part of being bipolar? The fact you love it."
Next Joke
"A retarded kid, chemo patient, and midget walk into a candy store... [And walk out with jawbreakers bigger than their heads!](http://imgur.com/HwGG6mm)"
"I hate when people text 'call me'. I'm going to start calling people, say 'text me' and then hang up."
"Lawyers' Ethical Dilemma When a client gives you two hundred dollar bills stuck together from the bank machine to pay a $100 bill, do you tell your law partner?"
"NSFW Your cock's like Mt. Everest... It's hard to get up"
"Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to Hungary."
"I'm going to donate these clothes I don't wear anymore to charity after I drive them around in the trunk of my car for eight months."
"Whenever your ex says, ""You'll never find someone like me,"" the answer to that is, ""That's the point."""
"""...until death do us part."" *looks at minister* ""What about a Walking Dead situation where she's a zombie? Then I can bang other chicks?"""
"Her pussy was such the color purple Oprah winfrey starred as the clit"