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Joke of the Day

"So I was at Legoland the other day and I saw a couple making out I thought it was inappropiate so walked up to them and said ""Come on guys, this is Legoland. Build a room."""

"'Twas the day before Christmas, and all through the mall There were multiple reports of trampling injuries."

"""You see those footprints? It looks like our killer had feet."" - If you want to know why I was fired as a writer on CSI."

"Almond Butter: For people that like peanut butter but don't want to be happy."

"What do a baby and an Etch A Sketch have in common? If you don't like it, you just shake it and start over."

"A swastika has been spray painted over Donald Trump's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame... ...Police say it's impossible to tell if the act was committed by Trump's opponents or supporters."

"I had beer at lunchtime and now I think I might be sitting in the wrong office"

"Why won't men perform oral on women the morning after sex? Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese sandwich?"

"Nobody gracefully gets out of a beanbag chair."

"How bad is it to poop your pants? It Depends"