119860

Joke of the Day

"My boss bought a breathalyzer for our office because everyone comes back from lunch drunk. My personal best is .16"

"Why didn't the police shoot the polarbear who was wandering peacefully around the streets? Because he was white."

"Who has two thumbs and looks an awful lot like Alec Baldwin? Alec Baldwin"

"My lesbian neighbour just gave me a Rolex I think she misunderstood when I told her I wanna watch..."

"There are thirty cows and twenty eight chickens. How many didn't? Ten of them."

"What's black and runny? Usain Bolt."

"What did the reindeer wear to protect itself while Santa was watering the garden? Rudolph's red hose rain gear..."

"What did the blonde's left leg say to her right leg? Between the two of us we can make a lot of money."

"What does eating an old lady out taste like? Depends."

"I wanted to make friends but I had no facebook So I went out on the street and started shouting what I cooked, ate or drank. Right now I've got 3 followers - two cops and a psychiatrist"