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Joke of the Day

"8yo: Do we have a fire extinguisher? Me: Yes. 8yo: Where? Me:... 8yo: WHERE! 6yo: (from outside) It's spreading. Me: I'm up."

"what's it called when a duck farfs? A butt quack. Hahahahha I'm funny ..."

"What's the difference between a white story and a black story? A white story starts with ""Once Apon a Time"" and a black story starts with ""Y'all ain't gonna believe this"""

"What's the smartest piece of lab equipment? A graduated cylinder."

"What's the difference between a circus and a whore house? My dad didn't meet my mom at a circus or take me their when I turned 5"

"Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you're a dumb ass and you make poor decisions."

"Why don't soccer players get hot while running? Because they hve so many fans"

"How does Donald Trump adopt pets? He just grabs the first pussy he sees."

"This guy's shirt said 'blink if you want me' and now my eyes are watering and I need to close them but ohmygod you guys I DO NOT WANT HIM"

"What killed the Aztec? A broken heart."