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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a Kit Kat and an Essex girl? You can only get 4 fingers in a Kit Kat."

"Fun prank: tweet ""BRB CLEANING MY GUN!!!"" then don't tweet for 8 years."

"What does a Pirate say on his 80th Birthday? Aye Matey!"

"If you're a white guy and walk into Home Depot without wearing sunglasses on top of your head, they legally don't have to sell you anything."

"Drug dealer I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer today. I'm not sure what they're laced with...but I've been tripping all day!"

"I'm not gay... But I'm starting to get suspicious that my boyfriend may be! This one was dropped on me by my 10 y/o cousin yesterday."

"Your teeth are like the stars Yellow and separated."

"ME: Mint choc chip ice cream, pls. I got my own cone [places it on counter] EMPLOYEE: This is a traffic cone? ME: You must be new here."

"What do you call poppies from eastern Africa? Ethiopium"

"What do you call a veterinarian that can only work on one animal? A doctor."