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Joke of the Day

"Good cop: Just relax Moody cop: OMG, you again? I hate you, but I kinda misssed you, why don't you call anymore? You're going to jail"

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"Donald Trump is not a rapist. He's an ""alternative romantic."""
"How does Darth Vader manage to eat through that mask? He's force fed."
"TIFU by downloading different captions Whoops, wrong sub."
"Mum: How can you practice your trumpet and listen to the radio at the same time ? Son: Easy. I have two ears!"
"Mayweather is dyslexic, He's supposed to punch his opponent and hug his wife."
"Today and Tomorrow are in bed... Today is smoking a cigarette and looks over at Tomorrow who is sulking and says, ""I'm sorry you never come."""
"I always give 110%. Oops. Left out the decimal point. I always give 1.10%."
"Q: Why are cows always broke? A: The farmers milk them dry."
"A Statistic Nine out of ten prisoners enjoy prison rape."