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Joke of the Day

"Yo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!"

"I don't think peeing on a goose is the right answer.. But on the other hand.. I'm not sure it's the WRONG answer. -Drunk me at a zoo"

"What Do Bernie Sander Supporters Call Their Parents? Roommates"

"Do you know how to tell if a date rapist put a roofie in your drink? Wanna beer?"

"What's the difference between Stephen Harper and Rob Ford? One likes pipelines, and the other likes pipes *and* lines."

"I had to quit my job as a refurbished dildo salesman due to the recent influx of gay customers. Things have been pretty shitty lately."

"What do you call a well read/researched Bernie Sanders supporter? Not a Bernie Sanders supporter."

"I just realized that I get most of my news from Twitter. So... someone remind me what Pres Bieber's health care bill will do to your mom?"

"I like first aid classes its the only time I get to be touched by a caring human."

"What do call a Nazi that takes bribes? Paid-off Hitler!"