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Joke of the Day

"SHE sells sea shells by the seashore. HE thinks selling shells is the next big thing. THIS FALL zoey deschabl & bemdict cumblach are, IDIOTS"

"Did you hear about the Candy Factory they opened on the East Coast? It closed after a month... they couldn't find any good wrappers."

"If Jesus was on a penny they would call it a JC Penny I get sad every time I look in a mirror"

"There was one good thing still to be said about the politician who went to prison for stalking... He was a man of the peep-hole!"

"Did you hear that NYC paid Hillary Clinton $2,000,000 as a consultant for New Years Eve? They wanted an expert on dropping the ball at the last second."

"Why are Mexicans bad at UNO? They steal all the green cards."

"What do you call a constipated mason? A brick-layer."

"What sound does it make when you light a stick of dynamite in them middle of a sheep herd? ssssssssssss boom! baaaaaaaah!"

"Sean Connery doing a knock knock joke (X-post from /shubreddit) Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes Sean Connery"

"['90s] Did you hear McDonalds just bought the naming rights to that new hockey stadium? They're calling it the Mac-Arena."