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Joke of the Day

"I'm optimistic that within my lifetime it will become acceptable to wear your underwear to the supermarket."

"Have you heard of the 300-lb. college student from Japan? He graduated sumo cum laude"

"I went to the zoo, which is unfortunately closing due to a lack of visitors, and all that was left to see was... the going out of business snail."

"How much do pirates pay to get an earring? A Buccaneer."

"A priest, rapist, and pedophile walks into a bar... ...and he orders a drink."

"NORTH CAROLINA:We believe in family values. ME:Like Disney movies? NC:Exactly. ME:Like Mulan, where a cross dresser saves China? NC:..."

"How do you end an argument with a woman? Tell her to calm down. You're dead now but the argument is over."

"BREAKING: Mel Gibson will reprise his role in the sequel to 'What Women Want'. The sequel will be called 'What Stupid Fucking Whores Want'."

"During sex, my wife is a screamer in bed ...That is when I walk in on her."

"What is the difference between jam & jelly? I can't jelly my dick in her ass..."