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Joke of the Day

"I recently visited Japan It was great until I confused Kabuki with Bukake. Slightly messier and more dudes...which is odd cause I thought Kabuki is an all male thing."

"Ironically its exactly 12 steps from my car to the liquor store"

"Tips to reduce weight... First turn your head to the right and then to the left. Repeat this exercise whenever your offered something to eat!"

"i was sitting next to a gorgeous girl on the bus yesterday i was so nervous. i kept thinking to myself ""please don't get a boner, please don't get a boner"". she got a boner."

"Mexican artists were hired to make Donald Trump look more ""authentic"" to the Mexican demographic. So they drew a bunch of penises on his face."

"Just bought a thesaurus at the store and brought it home to find out the pages are all blank.... I have no words right now to describe how angry I am."

"What's invisible and smells like bananas? ....Monkey farts"

"Apparently trapping people in an elevator overnight (even if you have marsh mellows) not a good way to make friends, people are so sensitive"

"My grandfather was an ace dog fighter he taught Michael Vick everything he knows!"

"If the actor who plays Wolverine were to reveal that he's been a con-artist his entire life.... Would that mean this has all been a huge act, man?"