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Joke of the Day
"Lame number joke: Why is 8 scared of 7? Becaauuuussseee 7 8(ate) 9. You get it huh?"
Next Joke
"Chicken pot pie. My three favourite things."
"The guys who measure out the granite so it fits nicely in your kitchen were prob mad when they found out the term counterfeiters was taken"
"How do you make someone stare at a screen for 30 seconds? Please wait..."
"Notice you don't hear about,""Kony"" anymore? Glad everyone cared for like, five minutes."
"You wanna know how I hold my liquor? By the ears :p"
"How do lesbian carpenters work? No studs. All tongue in groove."
"What do you call a murderer who kills during breakfast time? A cereal killer"
"BOSS: You ok? ME: Yeah, why? BOSS: You have a sign that says ""2 Days Without Being Annoyed"" [maintaining eye contact, I change it to 0]"
"The only requirement to work at Hot Topic is the manager has to be able to shove a softball through your ear gauges."