116864

Joke of the Day

"Why are there 2 doors on a chicken coupe? Because if it had 4 it would be a chicken sedan"

"I told my girlfriend that I wanted to be cremated... I then told my family that I had no specific burial requests, just make sure that they don't have me cremated, no matter what."

"Q. What do Fred Flintstone and Osama Bin Laden have in common? A. They both look out their caves and see rubble."

"Put the punchline in the title. How do you piss off a redditor?"

"How many Creationists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? God."

"What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus? Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?"

"The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades."

"judge: ""you have chosen to defend yourself, is that correct?"" me: [muffled from inside full suit of armour] ""that's correct"""

"What starts with F and ends with UCK? Fuck"

"If I could, I'd wear plaid every day. But I feel as though doing that would cross several lines."