116723

Joke of the Day

"What did carbon yell at gold while trying to get his attention? A! U!!! If it doesn't make sense tell it so someone out loud. Pretty sure this is my first original joke :)"

"What do you call an Italian reggae enthusiast? A pastafarian"

"My Sergeant told us to ""fire at will""... It's kind of a shame. I liked that guy."

"In 2000 years, people will celebrate all this with chocolate eggs delivered by an imaginary rabbit. ~Time travelling me, to Pontius Pilate."

"A redhead girl, an Asian girl and a blonde girl are in 9th grade. Which one is the sexiest? The Asian of course, she's 10 years old."

"I'd like to tell you guys another dick joke but nah, it's too long"

"the best true fact about 'titanic' is that on the final night of shooting the entire crew was drugged with pcp. that's not a joke"

"I have been looking back at history. And Im starting to think, Hitler was the brains but Eva was the braun."

"Got kicked outta Starbucks for trying to order a venti mocha choca latta ya-ya creole lady marmalaaaaaaaaade."

"What's the worst part about 4 black guys driving off a cliff in an escalade? They were my friends. :("