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Joke of the Day

"There are three types of people I hate Niggers, racists, and hypocrites"

"I now know I'm getting old. I was watching some porn the other day and thought to myself wow that's a nice bed."

"What's the leading cause of violence in America? Volkswagen Beetles."

"No plastic surgeon will help me! I have really giant hands and I'd like to make them smaller, but every time I ask the doctor for a hand-job I get kicked out."

"How many liberals does it take to change a lightbulb None, because change can only come from a revolution of the working classes."

"A wife was dying. She called her husband and said, ""Gary, I've been unfaithful."" Gary answered, ""I know. That's why I poisoned you."""

"Why was the Energizer Bunny tried in court? He was charged with battery."

"My annual performance review says I lack ""passion & intensity"", guess management hasn't seen me alone with a Big Mac."

"What is something that basically stops when you stare at it, but flys by when you dont? There are two answere: Time and Boo (from Mario games). Just made this joke up what do you guys think?"

"Why did Princess Diana cross the road? A: Conservation of momentum. _____ *Also, give me your best dark jokes, I've been out of it a few years and I need to get some new material.*"