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Joke of the Day
"Woo! Let's get this weekend started! *Starts doing laundry*"
Next Joke
"Back in LA who wants to make plans & cancel them & talk about rescheduling but never do then just like each other's FB post to keep it cool"
"My kids have already agreed to have me frozen. I just wish they'd wait until I'm dead."
"Hipsters came before the chicken and the egg."
"Don't know why some countries have food problems If you're Hungary you could pour Greece over Turkey and fry it in Japan."
"I used to think I had bad taste, but then I met my girlfriend and now I know what someone with bad taste really looks like."
"For christmas i bought my girlfriend a pair of shoes and a dildo. That way if she doesnt like the shoes she can go fuck herself."
"I only trust people that like big butts. ...they can not lie."
"So I was at the bar last night.. and the waitress screamed...""Anyone know CPR?!"" I said, ""Hell, I know the entire alphabet!"" Everyone laughed...except this *one* guy."
"I used to think Paul Walker was Gay Turns out he's flamming"