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Joke of the Day

"I bet all those girls that ignored me in high school would still be pretty pleased with that decision."

"Why did they go from Windows 8 straight to Windows 10? Because 7 8 9!"

"How do you Think the Unthinkable? With an Itheburg."

"I'm glad the pet stores close before the bar does. I could see drunken pet adoption being a real problem for me."

"The ocean is full of sharks, jellyfish, man-eating octopus, and nightmare whales, but make sure you wait a half-hour after eating to go in."

"me: *tries to help old lady cross the street* old lady: I have a boyfriend."

"Why wasnt there any blacks in the flintstones? Because they were still monkeys."

"Why did the paraplegic man cross the road? He couldn't"

"Have you heard about this? It's a pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing."

"Where do you keep microscopic criminals? In cells."