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Joke of the Day

"I paid My 11 old $10 to do the dishes, so on her way to the bathroom I mugged her...because, you know, life lesson."

"What would you call a Mexican that lost his car? Carlos"

"My friend David recently lost his ID. Now we just call him dav."

"Ultimate joke formula Q: What did (x) say to (x)? A: (Rude slang) Examples: What did the catterpillar say to the leaf? ;3 ""F*** you"""

"A beautiful woman in the cafeteria just gagged while eating her banana... She's now dead to me."

"I have an L shaped couch... lower case."

"Bet they weed out lots of people at big city detective school in the jump off building/land on roof of another building class."

"What is your favourite variable? I'm not sure, It's always changing."

"What's your least favorite race? I personally can't stand 5K's"

"It still really upsets me that my dog stopped talking to me around the same time I gave up taking hallucinogenic drugs."