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Joke of the Day

"When I reached the border patrol checkpoint, I raised my kale smoothie & the officer immediately waved me through."

"Why did Jesus look so ripped during Crucifixion? CrossFit"

"I discovered a Star Wars themed sex technique... I call it the Hands Solo"

"Why are there so many female archaeologist? Bitches love digging up the past"

"Roses are Red, Violets are blue... ""Gorilla shot at Cincinnati Zoo."""

"Why do you get arrested for walking into an army base unauthorised in the USA? Because Obama doesn't like anyone sneaking in his barracks."

"I wonder if Hitler ever thought... ""Crap, did I turn the oven off?"""

"Nick Kroll and Amy Poehler are moving to France to start a family... They want a house full of French Krollers."

"Did you know if you put your ear up to a strangers leg, you can actually hear them say; ""What the fcuk are you doing?"""

"How many McDonalds workers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, because they can't climb the ladder."