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Joke of the Day

"My dad told me... My dad told me that if I don't get off reddit now he would slam my face on the keybioshdauiewbnfkbhwFIOEWJHFUI9WREFH p9efyh WHBUHF WFH89WRQ FUIWF QUIUIRP P"

"New Slogan for the Pro Choice Organization Cut out the middle man. Literally."

"Did you hear about the tragedy at the Hipster company's work retreat? There were several hundred casual tees."

"A Paladin takes his car to a mechanic. ""Whenever I'm driving, I get these strange urges to run over pedestrians."" The mechanic has a look under the car. ""Your alignment is off."""

"I was going to post a really cheesy pun but there was just no whey."

"What do you a call girl with a saggy vagina shaking her booty? Beef twerky."

"Scientists have revealed today that they have found a new drug for depressed lesbians.. .. It's called Trydixagain."

"In which fairy tale does a man kick another man in the balls, only to discover that his victim is actually a woman? Boot in Puss"

"What did Fred from 'Scooby Doo' say when Mystery Inc. finally found a mystery that was too scary for them to solve? 2scooby4doo"

"THREE LAWS OF SCIENCE: 1. IF IT SMELLS BAD IT'S CHEMISTRY 2. IF ITS MUSHY IT'S BIOLOGY 3.IF IT DOESNT WORK ITS PHYSICS"