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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a spot and a girl on her period? When you squeeze a spot, you get bloody pus. When you squeeze a girl on her period..."

"How long is a submarine? No, How Long is a Chinaman."

"Just changed my Facebook name to 'No one' So when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say 'No one likes this'"

"Did you know tank tops were illegal until the U.S constitution came out? It gave people the right to bare arms."

"Why did the two knives go to the dance together? Because they both looked sharp!"

"FB post from HS friend on pic: My boyfriend is such a dreamboat! My comment: So was the Titanic."

"women wearing veils at their wedding arent fooling anybody. you invited us to this shit we know its you under there. cut the crap lady"

"What's the difference between a lobster and an oriental woman run over by a steamroller? One's a crustacean and the other a crushed Asian."

"Trying to decide who to leave my middle fingers to when I die."

"Strip search? ... OK, but I'm going to need some background music."