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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes in the mornings I have dirty thoughts about a dead girlfriend Mourning wood"

"Ann! do you remember me? We have so many memories together Ann: **SEGMENTATION FAULT**"

"What did the redneck say to his sister? Oooh yeah, baby!"

"So my software came in today ... My mom asked if it was the curtains she ordered. I opened the box and turned around. ""Nope, just my Windows."" edit: [windows](https://i.imgur.com/niu6mMM.jpg)"

"What does an orphan get for Christmas? Really lonely."

"Hi, welcome to Starbucks! How can we spell your name incorrectly today?"

"*job interview* ""Youre 30? Why haven't you accomplished your life goals?"" ""Tbh I thought the Mayan apocalypse was real. No plan past that."""

"Justin Bieber is going to Hillsong Church conference. We'll see if they make a believer out of him or if he make Beliebers out of them."

"""Metric system? You mean the easy measurement system based upon multiples of 10, that every other country uses? Na. We're good."" - America"

"Why is Obama pro gay marriage? Because he is a cock sucker"