114435

Joke of the Day

"I overheard a midget complaining to a police officer that his pocket had been picked. The officer said 'I can't believe anyone would stoop that low'"

"I can't wait until this election is over and we can go back to calling Trump supporters what they were originally called Racists"

"*Maintains eye contact with the soccer mom feeding her kid organic kale chips while giving my kid a snickers bar."

"3 men walk into a bar, bartender say... How'd you get in here"

"If I can wear my underwear inside out and backwards all day with no one noticing, how important are they really?"

"What do you call a mollusc that's just short of consciousness? A Conch."

"I pulled a groin muscle getting out of bed this morning... over and over and over....."

"Did you hear about the guy who OD'ed on homeopathic medicine? He had forgotten to take them."

"""Computers will never replace humans."" - Cannibal wisdom."

"How does a Liverpudlian get to work... He doesn't."